Salvia Trip

The Wall (the skinny on salvia)

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Posted by jrdnjones on 11/09/2010
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Level:2
Type/Strength:10x
Method of Ingestion:Smoking

My salvia trips (I've done it two times) have had a long-lasting affect on my life. It is difficult for me to recommend salvia to anyone because tripping flat-out changed my life for upwards of a year, not including the paranoia two or three weeks after tripping. I'll go into detail about my salvia trips themselves, first, then talk about my experiences related to salvia at a mental hospital later in my life.

Doing salvia was an exercise in peer pressure. I was almost forced to buy it by my friends, or at least felt a lot of pressure to do so after much deliberation and anxiety. When I bought my 10x at a headshop, I felt very nervous and out-of-sorts, knowing that this was "it." See, salvia had gained popularity among local teenagers and my friends were behaving appropriately according to popular rumors and opinions. Their actions were like people initiating my into some sort of "salvia cult," cult being an exaggeration but it was as if a gaining a new tripper was an event.

I tripped with 3 others in a car at a lake where we sometimes would get high on marijuana. First, one of them described their trip--he met a wolf and was being dragged around in some netherworld. No others described their trip tonight--one just said he felt exactly how he normally feels on acid, nothing new. The one who met the wolf tripped first and exclaimed that he didn't trip as hard and had developed a tolerance. The other one claimed he felt just like he normally does all the time. The third member, the one who most seemed like he was inviting me into the salvia cult, tripped next. I was full of optimism for him, focusing on good thoughts and trying to impart these feelings onto him when he tripped. He behaved oddly during the trip, jumping out of the car window and later describing a white light that he had to pull himself out of in order to be saved. Finally it was my turn. I was the last to trip because I was the newbie.

I of course had no idea what to expect and immediately started tripping. My first memory is of the music in the car, like a soundtrack to my deathbed, playing something detached and reminiscent. I felt remorse and longing, but what I was experiencing was extremely strange. I was just a head, and as my mouth was opening it was being shaved away, upwards away from the edge of my lips. It was like I could control it, like there was an x and a y axis (figuring out that when I explain it it seems less real to me right now) and I could fuck in either direction but either one would pull my lip open. I guess as I focused on this, my perception changed and suddenly I was standing in front of a somewhat bright wall which was cutting into my my face. I really had no option but to just stand there as it clipped with its massive, machine like matter into my face and body. Suddenly I remembered: I had beem tricked into walking into this wall by some people. They looked just like my friends but weren't. The people who I thought were my friends were simulations being controlled by the real people who tricked me into this wall which was also quite deep.

Then I had more memories of what had happened. There was a place full of these walls that trapped me, and full of people who had fallen for it. I remembered so vividly the rumour that these walls existed and the feelings that the people had--first, the ones who were trapping others who thought it was so funny and were actually getting points from their god for trapping people, and the people who were trapped, essentially killed and forced to live a live in a computer (I remember thinking, why? why would you do this to me? I don't deserve this--I still have a life I want to live!)

I remember feeling that I would have to wait forever, knowing my friends were standing behind me watching, as I get eaten or shaved by this machine. Then some other things happened. It was like I had just began tripping.

"BUT IT HURTS!" I said, or thought. I had been turned into something from the inside, it felt like. I can describe the feeling as being turned into cold, dead flesh. Then I saw that I was really standing in a field somewhere, and someone had just given me the pipe. I had been standing there for a long time as a ... zombie! They had just gotten me high and were laughing at my response. I had a short discourse with the people like, "well I got high, I know now" and I felt like the most retarded, unaware zombie ever. It felt like I was tied to a stick or something, perhaps just my head itself.

Next, I became aware that I was in the car but the others were quite unreal looking, of course being simulations controlled by the people who had trapped me. Then I looked to my left (I was in the back seat) and my friend said "we're in a spaceship," and I started tripping again, that I was attached to the wall.

Everything I could see was being folded backwards into me, me disappearing along with it, so my choice was to lift my body upward with the motion of the peeling. This I felt would stop it, and it did--however, when I came to I was flipping around in the backseat, literally rolling backwards several time like a squirrel. My friends had never seen this before and I think it alarmed them somewhat. They reported that I had stared at the seatbelt lock and exclaimed "Your lock is no good!" but I have no recollection of this.

Next, they started driving around and I became aware of how little time had passed. I seemed very out of it and was still thinking about how I was dead, from the beginning of the trip. I began groping around automatically for something to prove I was real and ended up grabbing my wallet, an action I remember remorsefully thinking was very, very ironic.

For the next few days, I really didn't think about the trip at all intellectually because I didn't remember most of it. Mostly I felt the sense of being dead and was thinking about that, not remembering the wall bit until later, about a week, when I tripped again. I smoked 1 hit, "by surprise," (we hadn't really planned for it like the first trip) and as I began to trip, my friend in the front seat of the car (the one who said we were in a spaceship, something he denies saying) turned away from me and said, "I'm sorry."

It all came flooding back to me in terror that I was trapped and about to die and I tried desperately to save it. I remember saying to my friends, "why, why would you do this to me?" then explaining, "I'm not talking to you guys, it's ok." Then as I settled for the worst and decided I was doing the right thing in this prison, I announced to them, "I'm... making art! and music! (I deserve to live here, don't make me get eaten by the wall!)" So this is when I remembered most of my initial trip which I described in the first part of this post.

For the next few days I was thinking about how I was trapped in the wall, truly believing it and really hating it one morning. I had several related dreams and really never came to any satisfying conclusion about where I really was. We were walking in the woods once and I became afraid that this

Later, much later, I was in a mental hospital for reasons unrelated to salvia. This is interesting because most of what happened to me on salvia seemed to be happening to me in the hospital. They were going to make me step into the wall! The delusions were intense and specific, actually relating to the exact thing that had happened to me in the trip! I felt that others were feeling the same way, not really questioning how they knew (assuming they had smoked salvia or something or had just heard about how it could happen) and one kid even said in a therapy session, "I'm here because of what happened to me on salvia." So I was in this hospital, surrounded by retarded, crazy people, thinking I was about to step into some sort of wall as if my salvia trip was a premonition and be stuck there forever, even having visions of all the people they had locked away in a warehouse who were already stuck.

Weird right? So what do you think?

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Posted by grimjim on 09/24/2010
Rating: Unrated

I'm assuming that you are a youngish person? Peer pressure is a bad thing, especially just before taking salvia, as this focus can affect your trip in bizarre ways. Its a pity that you weren't able to do it in a more relaxed setting. This is what annoys me about young experimentalists. Taking it for the wrong reasons, without understanding, assuming its a sociable drug like marijuana. For some people it can be fun, others it seems it has little effect on, either because they don't take it properly or pretend it hasn't effected them when in fact it frightened the fuck out of them! And others like yourself, get so wound up beforehand that it gives a bad/negative trip. My friend, you should not be so hard on yourself. Life is too short to worry so much. Don't take it again if you don't want to. The fact is you should have felt confident enough of your own concerns not to give in to their pressure, making up your own mind to take it some other time - when YOU were ready, or not take it! Obviously it affected your peace of mind. Salvia can do that, and makes you see things in a very strange way. Don't worry about that any longer. Look back at it, release any fear of it, and laugh at it! Yes, have a good laugh in your own mind. Believe me as you get older you will understand such things do not matter so much. I too had a depressive/psych period in my life. My Dad said always to maintain a sense of humour. Let it go, and concentrate on new directions and ambitions in your life.

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Posted by mattdicar on 02/11/2013
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Wow, love this trip report. Really brings back vivid imagery from my trips..

It's amazing how much you were able to remember.

The 4th paragraph is like point for point, exactly what I remember seeing... awesome

I had the same sensation with my mouth.. I tried to speak to my friends and once opening my mouth, I couldn't close it completely.. it was stuck to the big wall that was clipping into me pulling my face/being open like an origami contraption, also pulling me farther away from my normal viewpoint and anything remotely familiar

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